That moment I decided to change my life…

It’s amazing how life has a tendency of opening doors when you’re ready. Yes, it’s a cliche. But cliches become cliches for a reason.

A couple of weeks ago, I started putting more energy into my creative side. I’m writing more, book coaching for a couple of clients, and spending time participating in writing challenges on Twitter. Yesterday, I quit my job. It’s been a long time coming, but it was messier than I’d anticipated. No, I didn’t fall apart. I didn’t cry, didn’t get angry. My tone was never abrasive. But I did maintain a cool distance while I spoke with my manager. Today, I turned in my letter of resignation.

I feel as though I’m free. Fifty pounds lighter and able to breathe after an extended stay in purgatory, paying for sins I wasn’t aware I’d even committed. Then an amazing thing happened. Doors began to open. Creative opportunities started popping up. I GET TO WRITE!!!!

I know things won’t be easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy. That’s not the way life works. But I will get time to pull everything back together. I’ve been working over 40 hours every single week for years now. I put my heart and soul into my program… Not because I loved the program, but because I loved my inspectors. They’re amazing people that deserved the attention to the program that a program coordinator should be willing to give.  In the process, my home suffered. My relationships with family suffered. The only friends I have in this town are related to my work life; save one or two exceptions.

In two weeks, that all changes. I will have time for my son, who deserves more than I’ve been able to give him. I’ll have time for my home, to finally clear the clutter of years of neglect.

I have several chronic illnesses. I wake up with less spoons than most people. By the end of my workday, I have only two or three spoons left. If I’m going to shower… that’s at least one spoon if not two. The rest of my spoons are dedicated to my son. It will be nice to allot my spoons to things about which I truly care.


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